I am sorry that I cannot sustain a constant and fortified mental health. I struggle with mental health. Some days are bad, some days are okay, some days are pretty dang sweet.
I believe this time, at least for the time being, I must keep to writing these posts as tweets.
I’m sure I’ve lost people. Most of the time I lose. When I behave in crazy ways, even if it is a violent mood breakdown, I lose. I lose because it’s not healthy, for most anyone reading it or hearing me say it.
All I can really do is to try my best to do better. Sometimes, I lose, sometimes I win.
I guess the wins aren’t enough to outweigh the losses I take. Oh well, fuck it. I need to win more, and lose less.
I’ve got to keep trying to do better. I’ll never surrender to the abyss, where unimaginable things dwell. Sometimes, it comes through my words, that abyss, the dark side of the force (Star Wars reference). I see how that would trigger readers into banning me from their existence. I totally get that, one hundred percent.
Otherwise, I want to say, thank you. If you’re reading. If no one reads, I’ll keep writing until people read. I never say never. I’ll always have hope that I can reach a good stride. My pace and nuanced flow will be what I imagined it to be. In the end, I think entertainment is the best. If I enjoy what I do, how I do it, maybe others will too.
Like Alan Moore’s character V said, in V for Vendetta. Ideas are bulletproof. There exists ideas within these stories, yaharrgh matey. Let’s find the gold in the seas, the ocean waits for us to explore. Thar be vast creatures in the deep, who play hide and seek, yarrr.
-dude