Yep. That’s where we’re now headed.
These waters are made of Eros, and if you don’t want to join me as I talk about these waters, feel free to see yourself out the door. I understand. Sort of. The damn Puritan frame of mind has made certain people see sex and romance as a profane subject. Some do not discuss such a topic, as it is deemed off-limits in polite society.
Well, I’ll let you in on a secret. Never, and I mean never- have I been accepted as a member of polite society. To me this is a clear sign that I’m just not cut out to be around or a part of polite gatherings or polite conversations. I can only fake being polite for so long before people realize there’s nothing polite about me at all.
My penis hasn’t gotten action since 2020. Going on three years, and my poor penis has been left alone. No woman, for the past three years up to the present moment, has showed a desire to have her pussy get with my penis. The last time I went more than a year without sex was from the ages of 13 up until the age of 17. Meaning, I become a horny little boy at age 13, non-stop fantasized about sexual acts with the girls I had the hots for in my school. And models and women actors. Then at age 17 I finally had actual sex. Her name was Meghan Mills, man- her tits were so big and amazing. I’ll never forget ole wolf pussy. I hope her pussy and massive titties are doing well.
Then every year, at least once, I got laid. Matter of fact, I now consider my early years of dicking down women, to have been a blessing. I know, sex as a blessing? Eh, you’re not from Jewish stock, and those shit head Puritans ruined everything, so it’s tough for most of you to see what I mean.
Very lucky and fortunate with women, up until I injured my spine. Literally could no longer lift weights. So, I stopped working out all together. I’d get in my cardio because I was pumped from lifting weights, plus I was already there in the gym, so I went maximum effort. And yes, it showed. I looked like a greek god, to quote my youngest sister.
It only took about three, four months, to lose all the hard work I had put in to chiseling my body to look like a sculpted work of art. At first it didn’t seem to matter so much. Then again, it did. The women were trashier, not as attractive, and I compromised who I was by lowering my standards. I did this because I care about the health of my penis. My torpedo wants pussy, or, it did. Not so much anymore.
Now, I watch porn and masturbate. It’s not a daily activity, more like once or twice a week. I don’t care, “porn is bad”, yeah yeah, whatever. Porn is the only appealing option I have these days.
Anyway, I look unhealthy and over weight. Maybe not obese status, but for sure a chubby dude. And guess what? Being in shape absolutely does make a difference in selecting a partner. Women, are not interested in me sexually, anymore.
Lifting weights, that’s forever gone. So, all I can do now is eat healthy, and try not to drink much beer, or attempt to cut beer out of my diet altogether. I used to lose weight fast, like, the Flash. Now, I dunno if it’s because I’m older or what, but it’s a much slower process. I’m not losing weight as fast as I once used to, which is a bummer.
I fell in love with someone. Find out this person lied to me about their gender. I’m not mad at her, but I am depressed. I thought for sure she had a vagina, and I was wrong. Which really upset me in a way where, yet again- I’m not getting any pussy. What a letdown. Biggest bummer I’ve dealt with so far this year. Yes, the year is young- boy, the fun I have to look forward to.
It’s not my penis’s fault. It’s kinda my fault, but I’m not going to beat myself up over injuring my spine. It happened, didn’t think it ever would, but it for sure did happen. Now I’m physically limited. Mentally limited, and physically limited.
Welcome to the suck. I wish it were that kind of suck, Jesus- blowjobs are by far my favorite present to receive. A blowjob is for sure a major blessing in my world. In fact, I only watch porn videos of women sucking dick. For whatever reason, that makes me so damn horny, it’s almost an epic experience for me. Like, legendary, you know? Anyway, it’s been so long since I’ve received such an amazing gift from a woman.
I wish prostitution were still legal. Again, Jewish thing- it’s the oldest profession on the planet, for Christ sake. And I have to trip on the fact I might be soliciting a blowjob from a cop? Then I get arrested, all because I was willing to pay a woman to suck my dick until I cum. There’s something wrong about that, I mean it. What’s the problem with a little money for some dick sucking, huh? No one is getting hurt. I’ll pay for pleasure, fuck it- if I can no longer get any for free, hell yeah I’ll pay if that’s what it takes to get some.
I’m aware how this depicts me. I don’t care. This is me being honest. Truth of the matter is, only one person reads these posts. If the one person is who I think it is, she probably wont run away and hide. And I’m so glad I’ve never verbally belittled her. She’s important to me, in a certain way, but she’s also off limits, as she’s spoken for. I’m not that bad of a boy, meaning, I’m no fucking home wrecker. I honor and respect those who have a partner. Cheating on your significant other might seem sex and naughty, but it’s a traumatic thing to do to your partner. It can literally ruin a man or a woman, if they find out their love had sex with someone else. I will not be a variable in that equation, ever. Never been my thing, never will be.
Anyway, all the single ladies leave me alone. And my penis is collecting dust. I feel bad for my penis, I really do. “I’m sorry little guy, I honestly can’t say if you’ll ever get to be with a pussy again. I’m so sorry. I wish I had the power to change that, but I don’t. I simply don’t”.
And here me and my penis are today. Maybe masturbating to some porn will happen later, I don’t pre-meditate and fantasize about near as much as I once did. Maybe I have low testosterone now, I don’t know. Imbalance in my hormones? Maybe. If it’s something that matters to me, I’ll go to a doctor and see what’s what. Due to me having zero prospects, I don’t really care what’s wrong with my body. It’s been long enough that I’ve basically submitted to watching porn. I figure at least I still have porn to watch, which is better than no porn at all. I have no spank bank, no clue how I lost that bank, but it’s gone. So yeah, porn helps because otherwise I can’t conjure up the sexy woman of my dreams like I once used to do.
This was me lamenting for my penis possibly never getting any ever again.
“It’s okay, little guy. Remember the good times. You were with more than the average Joe by far. You had a good run. And, we still got porn, right? Okay, I know. Try not to think about it.”